Sustaining a healthy relationship can be just as difficult, if not more so, as sustaining a green healthy home or a well-rounded body, mind, and spirit connection. It’s one of those things you’ve got to work on with fervor and without expectation of perfection. As soon as you involve another person in your life, you give up some “control”, so to speak – there is a new variable that is self-directed, and that direction may not always be the “right” one from your point of view.
But alas, love will bond you and your special one together, making it hard to cope with situation of disagreement and disappointment. To help mellow these out and prevent new tensions from arising, here are 6 quick tips for keeping that romance in the air.
Tip 1. Communication is Key
Number one – for any relationship – is communication. To this point, I refer you to plain old common sense. If you want something to work out for the long haul, you’ve got to be willing strike up conversations about what is on your mind and how you feel about the relationship – for better or for worse.
Tip 2. Empathy
If communication is key, empathy is the keyring that holds the power to communicate effectively. It’s crucial to relate to your loved one, sharing their feelings and taking them into consideration when you approach the situation. Nothing is worse than a cold shoulder when one is genuinely feeling down.
Tip 3. Have Realistic Expectations
Just put it to rest: you won’t ever wake up and magically see Brad Pitt or George Clooney (or for the guys) Scarlett Johansson or Cindy Crawford lying next to you - pardon the brashness. No one can always be the perfect person you want them to be – physically, mentally, or spiritually. They have to decide (and follow) that themselves. Even if they are great, people make mistakes and so will you! The point is not to think that this one person will always make you happy – no one can do that, sometimes not even ourselves!
Tip 4. Be an Individual, but Dependable
One of the most important things to remember is that you’ve got to be an individual. There’s not much worse than that super clingy approach to a relationship. Like most people, you may want to always people everyone, all the time. But remember to make time for you and your agenda. Just be sure not to commit to things you know you can’t do, because when you don’t do them, it’ll just look bad. Being an individual and dependable can go hand-in-hand with ease.
Tip 5. Mind Your Age and Fight Fair
No matter how well you conduct yourself, there will be a fight at some time, in some place, for some reason. Don’t make a habit of always heading back to that “one instance in some distant past” if it has already been dealt with – it just shows that there are deeper problems you should probably be making more clear (see Tip 1 above). Stick to the topic, try not to hold grudges, and – though it may sound impossible – apologize when you’re wrong. This can really do a lot for a struggling relationship.
That’s a steep order in the heat of an argument. You can do it. We have faith in you.
Tip 6. Acknowledge that Infatuation is Instant but Love is a Process
Above all, know that there is a major difference between Love and Infatuation: one of them is instant and the other can take lots of time, effort, and energy. It’s crucial that before you start dating someone on a serious level, you determine if it is infatuation or love you’re feeling. It’s not that one is better per se; it’s just important to understand where you heart lies.